Wednesday, September 21, 2022

Round 2 - Here we go again!

Some people will do anything for a story! 

Since I enjoy writing so much and I was experiencing a bit of a dry spell of ideas, after careful deliberation (NOT) I decided to have a heart attack. 

That is, my body decided to, I was just along for the ride. 

After surgery for lung cancer only a couple of months previous, I thought I had sort of paid my dues and I could treat myself with a little bit more ice-cream, dark chocolate and potato chips, just until I was recovered of course! 

Little did I know, as they say, that the surgery had taken a major toll on my body and some of my arteries were already dangerously close to being closed off due to high cholesterol and that it wouldn't take much to bring on an attack. 

It's a little ironic that I had recently begun riding my bike a lot and my fitness level was actually "quite good". This is a direct quote from the doctor who performed a stress test on my heart only a few months ago. There were "no concerns" according to him and the minor twinges I had been experiencing were most likely caused by the muscles around my heart. Well I'm calling bull-poop on that! 

As we all know, hindsight has exceptional vision and sometimes through the topsy turvey randomness of chance, crap happens. It may turn out to be fortuitous or sometimes it goes against you, who can say why?

Now, on to the story. 

Rose and I had driven out on Friday afternoon to spend the weekend at the cabin and I was excited to make major renovations to the outhouse. Believe it or not, some city folk are squeamish about using a good old fashioned pit toilet.

Their over active imagination can't help but conjure up images of crazed weasels latching onto any exposed or dangling bits and causing them big time grief. 

Some others are afraid of spiders or have sensitive noses and can't take the smell that they imagine must be present in a biffy house. As it happens, our back house is about as sweet smelling as they come. 

We use lye crystals, ash from campfires, charcoal from a friends BBQ and occasionally good old fashioned dirt to keep the odor down. Rose also has a little automatic spritzy thing to puff out some sweet smelling stuff and that also helps. Be that as it may, perception is reality as they say, and in an effort to make people more comfortable during their visit I was determined to install a flush RV toilet. 

I researched it, got Roses approval and purchased one, along with various installation accessories and a sheet of plywood to put in a new floor. 

Now, one of the less pleasant jobs when dealing with a pit toilet like ours is cleaning out the pit. I can hear you now saying "eeiyuuuue" as you imagine what that means! 

For myself, having spent many summers out at "the farm" belonging to my Auntie Evelyn and Uncle Alfred as a kid and having been put to work shoveling out the barn on many occasions, I actually don't mind the job. I don't look forward to it of course, that would just be weird! 

But I don't mind the job….. much. 

Tipping up the outhouse



The hardest part is tipping the outhouse over so you can get at the "sump", after that it's just a little shoveling and shazaam, a clean, sweet smelling biffy. (For a while) So on the day of “the event” I got to work and it's a hot, strenuous job. I had to make a few trips up and down the hill with the product of my labour (so to speak) and I'm pretty breathless and tired and at Roses urging I did stop a few times for a rest. And then I'm done and it's time to push the outhouse back in place but I'm very tired so I get cleaned up and stop for lunch. 

After lunch I decided to take a longer break and rest up on the bed before going back to work. But after a few minutes I began to feel strange; it started out as a similar feeling to very bad indigestion before spreading into my chest, arms and jaw as a very painful aching sensation and then it gradually eased off and went away. 

I was still thinking “whew, whatever that was, I’m glad it’s gone” when it started to come back again, more intense then the first time. At that point I gobbled down 5 baby aspirin, chewing 2 and swallowing 3 and when Rose asked me if I was ok, I told her “no, I have to go to the hospital.” 

We quickly grabbed a few things and closed up the cabin and headed to the hospital in Camrose, 30 long minutes away.

Rose is not a speeder or a passer on the highway and she definitely doesn’t drive through red lights while laying on the horn but she did all of those things and more. I’ll never forget clutching my chest, yelling “step on it, just go, pass this guy, don’t stop, go through the light, it’s ok, you’re doing great and similar things while poor Rose was just trying to find the hospital while trying to drive with tears in her eyes, crying from fear and stress.

I do not recommend it! 

Of course because of construction somehow hiding the hospital sign we actually drove past the turnoff and had to backtrack once I realized that we had missed it. At this point I was clutching my chest with one hand and trying to find the hospital on Google maps but wouldn’t you know it? The GPS couldn’t connect! It only took a couple of minutes to find the hospital but every second of delay seemed like a big deal to both of us at this point. 

We pulled up to the Emergency department bay doors and then drove right inside, expecting to find a highly excited medical team rushing to meet us, yelling things like “100cc of thoratzahepathizne stat!” 

Strangely, it was deserted and Rose helped me along as I staggered into the building, still clutching my chest, in terrible pain as Rose yelled out, “HELP, my husband is having a heart attack!” 

I ended up leaning against a wall as someone pushed a wheel chair under me and told me to sit down before wheeling me over to an exam room and beginning to examine and treat me. I remember an EKG and 3 sprays of Nitro under my tongue having little effect on the pain and then some morphine that brought some relief before eventually seeing a doctor and getting a handful of “anti-coagulants” I think they were called. 

When the doctor finally appeared; after a long string of “don’t worry, he’s coming soon, you’re next, he’ll be right with you” etc. etc. It turned out to be the same doctor who had seen me at the Sturgeon hospital emergency room back in February, what are the odds? I’ve been to the emergency room exactly twice in the last ten years and both times the same doctor, in hospitals 100 km apart, weird! 

Dr. Stan did his thing and quickly determined that I would need to be transferred into Edmonton and before you know it, Victor and Logan had bundled me onto a gurney, hooked me up to a very sophisticated monitor and after some hasty goodbyes to Rose, I was on my way to the CK Hui Heart Center at the Royal Alex. 

In the ambulance while being transferred into Edmonton, I asked Logan, the EMS attendant if we had done the right thing by driving in, he very gently informed me, “probably not, we could have met you on the highway and given you some clot buster drugs”. As I looked around at the well-equipped ambulance, I couldn’t help but agree and I determined right there that if there ever was a next time that is what we would do.

At the heart center I was shocked at what an incredible upgrade it was from the Shutter Island kind of ward that I was incarcerated in after my lung surgery! Someone said that the high profile, “sexy” sort of medicine like cardiac surgery gets all of the money and the best equipment and I can’t argue. 

I felt like I was on an American TV show and they had me in the presidential suite, it was very deluxe and I had a room all to myself until after my “procedure”. Then it was back to reality but still much newer and more tolerable than the wards in the old part of the hospital. 

After arriving at the Royal Alex, my heart seemed to relax and the blood kept flowing, meaning that I had no chest pains and since it was a Friday night and the “Cath team” only comes in on the weekend for emergencies, it took a few days before my case was deemed sufficiently serious to get me in for my angiogram/angioplasty. 

In the mean time they took very good care of me and for the first few days I was constantly monitored for blood pressure, temperature, oxygen, and I don’t know how many EKG’s they did, but it was a lot! I felt very lucky to have made it so far and Rose and I both felt that I was in the right place. 

Since they work strictly on a priority of needs basis, there is no scheduled time or date for procedures in the “Cath Lab” and they tell you to be ready at all times during the day. So make sure your bladder is always empty, don’t eat too much and just wait patiently until someone says, “they’re on their way.” That’s exactly how it played out, all of a sudden after 4 days of waiting; I was told “they’re coming for you!” 

Rose and I in the Healing Garden before the Angioplasty



Twenty minutes later I was being wheeled into place and shifted onto this very narrow little table surrounded by computer monitors and scanners of one sort or another. Then it was swabbing any possible access points to my arteries with industrial cleaner that left my skin dyed red and then injections of blood thinners and whatever other drugs they felt necessary or appropriate. 

Someone was constantly talking to me asking if I was doing ok or explaining what they were doing and asking if that was ok with me and I’m telling them, “sure, do whatever you have to.”

The fellow actually performing the angiogram seemed to be learning the craft under the watchful eye of the cardiologist that I was familiar with and who had visited and examined me several times over the past few days. I was feeling a little bit apprehensive about having this other guy actually doing the procedure, but at that point there isn’t a lot you can do about it and everybody’s got to learn somehow I guess. 

There was a lot of cross talk during the procedure and I don’t remember much of it but what I do remember was the feeling of having the catheter sliding up the artery in my arm and then into my heart. 

Beforehand, the talk from the nurses was all, “they’ll give you some pain meds and something for anxiety and you won’t feel a thing!” But let me tell you, I felt plenty! 

I could feel the wires sliding through the catheter, I could feel something going on in my heart, and when they were doing the angioplasty, it felt like another heart attack! Right in the middle of it all I had to say something. I was afraid of distracting them but I eventually piped up, “hey guys, I feel like I’m having a minor heart attack right now!” That’s when they calmly explained, “oh yeah, we have to cut off the flow of blood to your heart for a little while when we are doing the angioplasty, don’t worry it’s normal.” 

While it may be normal, it sure the heck is unpleasant! Eventually they were done the internal stuff and they practically yanked the catheter out of my arm and after 45 minutes of unpleasantness, more and worse unpleasantness was getting ready to dump itself on me! You see, with me it is never simple. Other people, sure,  once the procedure is complete the patient quickly recovers and they go home. 

For me, it’s 10 lovely days in the hospital waiting for the air leak in my lung to stop and the subcutaneous emphysema to heal up. Then it's, "whoa, look at the big leak in the pressure cuff, blood is squirting everywhere!" And on this lovely occasion, for whatever reason, as soon as I got into the recovery room, my arm began to hurt and to swell up like a balloon, yay! 

I guess I’m a complicated guy! 

I was feeling pretty sorry for myself at this point. Rose had to leave to pick up Junie from daycare and even though she stayed as long as she could, as soon as she left I felt very alone with my troubles.

Feeling sorry for myself - hey, it's what I'm good at!

 

I had to pee like crazy, I was having asthma trouble, my dinner just sat there getting cold because I was in no shape to eat, my heart still felt like an elephant was sitting on it and to top it all off my poor arm was swollen and painful. When I mentioned my arm to the nurse, a much harried guy who was apparently dropped into a busy recovery room when the nurse on duty just “went home” because of some kind of a family emergency, he quickly grabbed a pressure cuff and began pumping it up to try and get the swelling down. 

My arm in the pressure cuff



At this point I texted poor Rose and shamelessly hinted that I needed her to come back and to my relief she took the hint and quickly offered to return. Within a half hour I had my sweet wife/advocate looking after me and with Rose along with my new, nightshift nurse Kelly taking over, I was soon feeling much better. 

Rose jumped right in there and offered to do anything that Kelly needed her for and since I was strapped to a bunch of things and couldn’t leave to go to the bathroom, brave Rose ended up with urinal duty. 

That left Kelly free to concentrate on the medical and she quickly realized that my arm was perhaps beyond the usual, occasional bruising complication and she called for the doctor on duty to come and have a look. He did a bedside ultrasound and didn’t see anything that was overly concerning and after squeezing and prodding my arm for a while, proclaimed that the nurses were doing a good job following the protocol and it should be fine. 

I find it curious how the medical staff tries to make it sound routine, “oh sure we see this a lot, it’s a common post procedure complication, nothing to worry about at all.” 

But they couldn’t control their initial reaction when they saw my arm. Then it was “YIKES” as they cringe back, or “WHOA” as they make an involuntary “Yukky” face. 

Nothing like that to inspire calm and confidence in the patient!

Bruise-what bruise?



My new buddy, nurse Kelly who had a kind of Meg Ryan vibe going, with the curly blonde ringlets that Meg was sporting in the 80’s compared my arm to Popeye’s, with the huge forearm (and normal sized manly bicep) and we both got a good laugh at that. It was a very long night with alternating cold packs and pressure cuffs all night long and it felt good to laugh. 

My nurse looking at my arm - kidding


Me - if both arms had the same swelling


The next morning they kicked me over to the ward into a semi-private room and I was told if I was still worried about the arm, they would schedule a formal ultrasound and keep an eye on it for a day or two. Since I had no desire to end up sitting forever in an ER waiting for someone to take a look at my arm, I opted to stay until they (and I) were sure that it would be ok. 

My new room-mate was an old guy waiting for a triple bypass and when Rose saw him languishing there without a phone or visitors, she kindly offered to bring him a coffee and gave him a slice of Barb’s bran loaf and then she wisely went home.

What she didn’t know was that he had been suffering from constipation for the past few days and to say that her accidental ministrations were successful would be the understatement of the year! 

For the next two days I was subjected to the repeated blasts and the long lingering effects of her neighborly gesture. I was just sorry that Rose never seemed to be around with me at the right time to share in the joy. 

The angioplasty procedure was on Tuesday and it was Friday afternoon before they finally let me go home but I’m glad I stayed for the extra 2 days. Today it’s a week later and my arm is still very painful and purple right up past the elbow and even with the ultrasound and extra care, I’m still tempted by the lure to have it looked at again. 

10 days after the Angioplasty



That is the story of my latest medical emergency and yes, it’s been quite the year so far!

Some of you may be wondering if there is someone up there casting lightning bolts and trying to zap me, or perhaps just trying to scare me and the truth is, I just don’t know.

I don’t believe for a minute that God is actively trying to vaporize me, but there is someone else who just might be out to get me and sometimes God does let some of those pot-shots through for His own very good reasons. Perhaps He wants to get my attention and if that’s the case, I’m listening carefully and I’m ready to hear whatever He has to say. 

Rose has her own take on things of course. Right from the beginning when we found out about the cancer and how it was discovered and treated so early, she believed faithfully that God had set that outcome in motion by ensuring it was caught before it had a chance to spread. 

Later, after the heart attack, the cardiac doctor spoke to us to make sure there was no surgery scheduled for the cancer. He told us that I was committed to taking some pretty strong blood thinners for a year, making it extremely difficult if further cancer surgery was called for. When we heard that, we realized that things had happened in the right order, cancer surgery first, heart attack second! Who knew? I certainly didn’t plan it that way. 

God didn’t send the disease, it happened for a number of reasons: genetics, lifestyle, environmental, etc. But when the time came and the illness that had been there on the horizon for years finally happened, the big things worked out as well as they possibly could and we’re both grateful for that!

If this is the first you are hearing about my latest misadventure, I apologize. Neither Rose or I felt much like talking or texting or blogging about it before now. It came out of the blue and we're both still feeling a little PTSD from the whole thing. With no chance to prepare or get used to the idea beforehand it seems even tougher to deal with than knowing about the cancer and reading and planning for the surgery. 

I very much appreciate your prayers, well wishes, and other gestures of love and support so thanks and God bless!

Update - September 21
Well things have been going great and I'm busy taking my meds like a good boy. Now I'm feeling my age with a handful of morning meds and another handful at night and checking my blood pressure, pulse and oxygen levels daily.

Rose is always willing to go the extra mile, literally, as she did all of the driving for the first month and that was hard on both of us! I am a much better driver than I am a passenger.

Adjusting our diet to stringently avoid saturated and trans fat is probably the biggest adjustment, I love my burgers! Now hamburgers are out of the question and as much as I love chicken, it's just not the same.

Rose did the lawns out at the cabin and after staggering along behind the mower for an hour or two she went into full rebellion mode and insisted that we buy a new lawn tractor. 

And that's how we came to purchase "Chompy" the Ferrari red Craftsman lawn tractor and I love him, he does a great job on the lawns and trails at the cabin. 

Me happily enjoying a ride on "Chompy"



Since I'm doing so well and right now covid is not such a concern, we are back at church and enjoying it very much and the photo club is back and seems to have lots of activities planned and life is good all around!

We are planning to enjoy each day and be glad for all of the good things in our lives and I hope you will do the same.

Blessings all!

Saturday, May 7, 2022

Waking up to life

Well, it’s done! 
The surgery is complete and I'm now just trying to recover and recuperate. 
I don’t mind saying that I was terrified of this surgery, or any surgery for that matter. Just the idea of someone cutting into my body is enough to send my brain into paroxysms of apprehensive flight response.
Basically, I want to go away. 

As my granddaughter Junie would say, “hide and go seek……. you hide Papa”. 
I’ll hide alright! 
But then another more aware part of my brain (named Rose) cracks the whip and I find myself in a hospital bed. 

Here I am, groggily snapping a selfie (or maybe Wilson took the photo) of me and my happy face sporting, breathing exerciser that I have befriended and named Wilson. 

He, I,  and our other buddy, Morphine have been having a ball, but sometimes Wilson is a real drag! Buda-bing!
Me and my new buddy Wilson, clowning around
Rose has been around all afternoon running to Tim Hortons for tea and donuts, she is so great, what a peach. 

Everyone here at the Royal Alex has been terrific and they’ve been taking good care of me. 

It’s a long list of kind people and maybe it’s the drugs wearing off but the first really memorable person that comes to mind from surgery today is Michelle in post op. 

I had no idea what was happening but when I slowly and befudlingly clawed my way back into the land of the living, hers was the voice of reality that I clung to. It may have gone something like this, “Doug, are you with us? Welcome back! I need you to squeeze my hand, Doug……Doug, come on, give us a squeeze, you’re doing fine”. 

Well, Michelle you will probably never know how wonderful it was to hear your kind voice as it slowly sank in that I had indeed survived the surgery. Not that it was particularly dangerous but we all know that unplanned things can happen in surgery and with my overactive imagination on overdrive for the past few days, survival felt like a miracle. 

The surgery took place in Theatre 5 and everyone, from the 2 anesthetists, (the primary doctor and the resident named Allie), to the nurses and Dr. Laing who was my surgeon, were all awesome. 

I am not shy about telling my medical caregivers how much I appreciate them and I have become downright chatty around here in the intensive recovery room. That’s what I’m calling it. There are 4 beds and I hear they are usually fully occupied but there are only 2 of us tonight with one nurse shared between us. And from what I’ve seen, the extra care is definitely needed.

It’s a 20 minute ordeal to get me up to the washroom and when I get there I’m crammed into our tiny bathroom with my IV pole and the box that is connected to the chest drain tube and a very shy bladder!
We had a little drama with the chest tube while Rose was visiting. We were trying to get me out of bed for the first time and when I sat up it revealed a big puddle of blood where the tube had been oozing for a while. I'm not too fond of the feeling of blood pouring out of me, but it was quickly staunched along with my dignity as I was wrestled into a clean gown and thankfully, a pair of boxers. 

The night resident doctor was called to look at the suture and he fiddled with the tube and pronounced it ready for a new dressing and it’s been good ever since.

I brought along some noise cancelling headphones and ear plugs and my tablet with a detachable keyboard and I’m glad that I had all this stuff last night. 

How to get through the night in a hospital ward


There was some kind of medical drama with the other patient and it sounded like at least 5 people in attendance. Eventually the kerfuffle died down though and it all seems to be under control. 

Writing in bed at 3:00 am and listening to music while pandemonium breaks out across the room is a very strange occurrence but I’m smart enough to know when there is nothing I can do to help. 

Strangely enough I feel well rested after a weird, disjointed night and in a strange way, it's kind of fun! I've met some lovely  members of the marvelous nursing staff here during my stay.
 
There have been a long succession of nurses looking after me. Starting with Phyllis and then Chou and Jo & Tommy & Christie & Kristen & Hannah & Elisabeth & Alicia and Divya and  many others at one time or another, all a blessing to me. Thank you!

Today it's Grace.

Usually she works downstairs in pre- admitting but today she is picking up an extra shift. It's the first time in 8 years she has worked in this observation room and through a fortunate confluence of life streams, we've come together to be buddies for the day.

I appreciate all of the little kindnesses that she's showered over me today and I want her to know she's doing a great job. 

I did have surgery, but I'm doing ok, due in part to Grace and the rest of the nursing staff and how well they've done their job. So no, I'm not shy about saying it out loud.

But after about the 15th time I was forced to shut up about it while they stuck a thermometer in my mouth to take my temperature, I'm starting to think they may be getting tired of hearing it!

Rose of course shows her appreciation in more tangible ways, she made some chocolate muffins but couldn't bring them in for the staff, so she picked them up some Turtles and Werthers (pre-wrapped goodies are ok).

It doesn't hurt my stock around here to have such a sweet and personable wife/advocate! 

Rose though, just can't help trying to be helpful. 

I have a dickens of a time getting her to sit down and just relax and talk with me! Instead she wants to redecorate my space, “ if we just move this over here and unplug this unnecessary equipment it will be much better, what's that beeping? It sounds kind of urgent!!!!”

She's a total sweetie but she makes me nervous around here. I handed her my phone for a second while we were walking because I had no pockets. She  put it in her back pocket and immediately headed for the bathroom! Of course my brain immediately goes to the worst case scenario and I sent the nurse off for a bag of rice ( you know why). 

Just kidding, but she was sure surprised to see me chasing her down the hallway trying to get my phone back so soon after my surgery.

Silly it may be, but it's definitely hard to relax with those sorts of visions in my head. Of course it was all good and Rose laughed at me when she got back with my completely dry phone. 

But I can't help it, I'm me. Completely unapologetic and proud to be me! And on our 39th anniversary I'm proud to be married (still) to a completely amazing, beautiful, kind, compassionate and sometimes scary, woman of God. 

I talked to one of the surgeons today and he told me it went great, they were able to remove all of the tumor even though they had to make a little bit bigger incision in my side to get it all out. They also took some lymph nodes around the tumor and are sending them off to be analyzed and hopefully they will not be malignant. 

This morning I had 6 different cables and tubes attached to me and now it's just the chest drain tube and that appears to be doing it's job and they are happy with the amount and colour of the fluid. 

They just moved me into a room with 3 women but at least I have a window and a privacy curtain I can close. My gown tying skills leave a lot to be desired and Magic Mike I am definitely not!

For the most part, things are on track except for a persistent air leak in my left lung that is keeping me here much longer than expected.  

I'm tired and discouraged but we are slowly inching towards my discharge and life is good, God is good. In many ways I feel like the luckiest guy in the world. So much love, prayer and support has come my way through all of this that it has really been a blessing.

Rose heard a beautiful song called Brighter Days by Blessing Offor and thought it would cheer me up (10 days in the hospital seems like forever) and boy did that backfire! It's a wonderful song, but sometimes when you're going through stuff your emotions just can't cope with forward looking hope songs. 

Check it out here
https://youtu.be/I6lp1Oxb9L4

Whatever happens now, I thank each and every one of you who has been on the journey with me and taken time out of your busy lives to read this blog and reach out to Rose and I with love and kindness. 

The meaning of life is this – RELATIONSHIPS

Like you, I've known this for a long time but I haven't always acted like it. If I've learned anything at all going through this illness it's to value the people in my life more.

Covid has put barriers between us and particularly so for me as fear of contracting the virus before my surgery has stopped me from spending time with friends and family and church.

I miss the hugs, I miss the meals and laughs, I miss my photography club buddies.

I've always been blessed in so many ways but particularly when it comes to my wife and family and friends. Thank you for being there for me. Happy 39th anniversary Rose, you're one in a million❤

Friday, April 8, 2022

Waiting for the Enemy

 

Headline - Granddaughter & cat team up in attempt to save mans life

It started innocently enough in December with a cold. 

This particular cold entered our house attached to a little sweetie named Junie and it packed a real punch with both Rose and I suffering with it a long while, but for some reason I was slower to recover and never fully did.




Then it was January and I started to have very strong allergic reactions to a cat we have had for years. All of a sudden I had a whole bunch of new, asthma- like symptoms. After a few days of this I went to our family doctor and came away with a prescription for a salbutamol puffer and a requisition for a chest x-ray and a bunch of blood tests as well as an appointment to have my breathing measured.

Then I got the phone call that changed everything.

I had pneumonia, but on the chest x-ray there was something suspicious on my lung, a shadow, maybe nothing, but maybe something serious.

Another chest x-ray led to a referral to a lung specialist and an emergency appointment to have a CT scan in a couple of weeks. But hey, just in case you’re not freaked out by all this scary news Mr. Petry, your ecg showed some irregularities and I’ve scheduled you for a cardiac stress test next week, yikes!

I should say at this point that I am very grateful that all the tests and doctors’ appointments happened so swiftly. Today is February 20th and my first doctor’s appointment was on January 25th and since that time I’ve had ten different medical test appointments culminating with a CT scan on Friday the 18th and 6 hours in the emergency department for an unexplained very strong throbbing pain in my right side towards the back.

It was a long night but of course the pain subsided greatly over time and they ruled out a few things and sent me home about 1:00 am Sunday morning to await my referral appointment with a lung specialist. I was told that they would call when they are back in the office on Tuesday or when they see the CT scan.

The ER doctor did confirm that there is some kind of mass on my left lung and after some probing questions from me he did say that he couldn’t see anything amiss in my abdomen even though that’s where most of my mysterious pains seem to be coming from.

A few days have passed and I now have an appointment to see the Lung Specialist at the Royal Alec Hospital on March 14th so that’s great! I also have an appointment to have my lung capacity re-tested at the orders of the lung specialist.

Until then, I am in a kind of limbo, knowing that there is something terribly wrong, fearing the worst and yet trying desperately to hang on to some hope.

Rose has been amazing; kind, considerate and loving as she tries to navigate through this unexpected, frightening time in our lives. I know I’m not helping her state of mind as I get our financial papers, life insurance, will and all the other need to know issues dealt with. 

There is a lot to know with two rental properties and their finances and possible issues as well as our own house and all its little foibles that only I know about.

Where is the switch for the furnace?

Where are all the water shutoff valves?

What about those interconnected wireless smoke alarms, they are a pain in the derriere sometimes!

What about the security system, passwords for accounts and apps on my phone, where are those important papers, keys, warranties and instructions, etc.?

The drainage in our yard sucks big time, in spite of all that I have done to improve the situation over the years and what if I wasn’t around to take care of things?

What about the water sensors in the basement? We have 5 of them for peace of mind as well as 2 at the rental property and 1 at the condo.

We tend to assume that we’ll be around for a long, long time but that can change in a heartbeat!

Rose and I have tended to compartmentalize our various jobs around the house and in our marriage and all of a sudden we are realizing that we both need to know the other persons jobs as well as our own!

Right now, poor Rose is getting a crash course on on-line banking and general computer skills and I think she’s now regretting leaving it to me for all these years. I know she’ll be fine, but if the worst happens, feeling confident to take care of these day to day tasks will definitely help her a lot.

2

Well the enemy has now arrived! It’s April now and the weather is beautiful with sunshine every day and the snow melting from the yard at a furious pace, spring is here at last and along with the spring comes the news that we’ve been dreading. Lung CANCER has been confirmed at last. 

Where did it come from? What does it mean for our lifestyle and future? How will we treat it and what will that mean for our lives?

These are the questions that we are asking ourselves right now. Today is a week after my bronchoscopy at the Royal Alex hospital and yesterday I received an email from MyAHS Connect, the Alberta Health services website that allows patients to view their own test results online. What a great blessing this system has been as we try to navigate this illness.

When I had the bronchoscopy, the doctor told us to expect a call with the results in about a week and that is today, I expect he will have some kind of a treatment plan worked out so he can offer us some hope along with the news. I wonder how doctors feel about this new system; I wouldn’t be surprised if I saw the results of my test even before he did!

Speaking of the bronchoscopy, I DID NOT ENJOY IT! Not that you are meant to of course, a necessary evil I suppose. But for a person like me who has not given birth or had much in the way of illness or injury over the years it was a bit of a pain. Once again though, I feel compelled to say that all the health care people, doctors, nurses and support staff have been terrific and I very much appreciate them!

On the other hand, I am a model patient, following instructions compulsively and trying to be as cooperative and compliant as possible, so I suppose that may help things go more smoothly on occasion.

We don’t know yet what he will say when he calls or what the treatment will be but for now I am trying to be as proactive as possible and I’m chugging our frozen cranberry and chokecherry juice daily in an effort to give my body a fighting chance.

It just so happens that my happy place, (the cabin of course) is covered with berry bushes with branches weighed down by Saskatoons, Cranberries, Chokecherries and Black Currant/Gooseberries (we have both and It’s hard to tell them apart).

A berry healthy breakfast


We have a freezer full of various berries and juice so I’m well fixed for anti-oxidants and those nasty free radicals had better watch out! Chokecherries in particular look promising as a cancer fighter but don’t worry, beyond guzzling juice I plan on doing whatever the doctors and my wife tell me to.

Rose is a bit of a tiger when it comes to treatment and she is determined as can be that between God, the doctors, herself and Chokecherry juice, the dream team can beat this thing.

3

I’ve had a while now to get used to the idea that I may have cancer and now that it’s been confirmed the focus shifts to next steps, getting my affairs in order so to speak. Beyond that, what can I do to help my body fight this as much as it can? As a Christian I actually believe in the power of prayer so the prayer will continue and probably get more intense!

Not that it’s easy when it comes to something like this. I’ve prayed for others hundreds if not thousands of times and I absolutely know without a shadow of doubt that in as much as it depends on God, prayers are often answered. 

So I will ask for prayer and I will pray for myself, slipping these prayers in alongside all the others that make up my usual prayer life. But still it seems strange to be praying for myself since the usual prayer ratio is about 50 to 1 in favour of friends, relatives, church members, our city, our country and this messed up world. It feels a little bit selfish to bump myself up towards the front of the queue.

One encouraging note is that the cancer is likely stage 1 at this point, meaning that it is of a relatively small size and doesn’t appear to have spread to the lymph nodes or beyond the left lung.

In one of those coincidences that God is famous for, a common cold that entered the house through my little granddaughter got my immune system ramped up into high gear. Helped along by my usual dosing of herbal antivirals, it kicked up such a fuss that I could barely breath!  

Rose immediately began a series of “keep the cat” measures that includes using the furminator cat fur remover, rubbing Zoey down with Allerpet, vacuuming the house about 4 times a week and buying a high end air purifier. Yet in spite of all her herculean efforts my dormant cat allergies finally drove me to do what is obvious to most people.  

A few nights with a head that felt like a solid block of wood absolutely forced me past my stubborn male reluctance to see a doctor and ultimately caused the cancer to be discovered at a very early stage, so for that I give thanks!

4

Well it’s April 8th and we heard from the doctor today. It’s officially stage 1 and they are booking me in for a Pulmonary Lobectomy in May. Apparently with this procedure called VATS (video-assisted thoracoscopic surgery) one of the 5 lobes of your lungs is removed through three small incisions and after a few days in the hospital, the patient recovers at home in two to three weeks.

Apparently my lung function now is perfect so with one lobe removed I should have about 80% of my current lung capacity after the surgery. This means that my Everest climb is off (just kidding) but otherwise I should be ok for most day to day exertions. 

They’re going to do a PET scan before the surgery to make sure that there are no other areas of concern and if all goes well I won’t need chemotherapy, so yahoo on that!

Emotionally, I feel I’ve done ok so far, with the possible exception of a few days ago. I made the mistake of listening to Jason Isbell and the 400 unit sing “If we were Vampires” with headphones on and that led to a good cry as I thought about not being here for Rose and for Junie and Kait and April.

P.S. the song is not about vampires so don’t be afraid to give it a listen. 

https://youtu.be/JV7c8V5XLk8

We’ve probably all lived it, or at least seen those movies where the ones left behind have to deal with the loss of a loved one and the thought of doing that to my family is painful in the extreme.

Rose of course believes rather strongly that it is all going to be ok, and if you’ve read any of my other writing, you will know that she is usually right!